Living with ADHD: A Personal Journey

Living with ADHD often feels like both a gift and a challenge. While I struggle endlessly with mundane tasks like answering emails or paying bills, I thrive under pressure and love staying busy. As a result, my bathroom is always clean! The following is a personal journey with ADHD, filled with moments of frustration and heartbreak, but also with great support and community, which got me through.

School and Diagnosis

Growing up, I struggled significantly in school. While other students could sit through a class without a problem, I found myself daydreaming, getting up and goofing off, and frequently twiddling my thumbs in the hallway after being kicked out of the classroom. Homework was a battle because staying focused long enough to complete it felt nearly impossible, and to be honest, I rarely even tried to do it. I also struggled in school due to multiple learning disabilities and was unable to read or do even basic math until middle school.

Teachers often labeled me as "distracted," "not living up to my potential," "chatty," "stupid," and "difficult." These comments hurt me deeply, leaving me with a sense of inadequacy and a disdain for authority and the education system as a whole. After being diagnosed in the 4th grade, teachers and staff became more aggressive and unkind, labeling me a troublemaker before I even stepped foot in their classrooms. In the 6th grade, I was abused by staff at a small middle school and was pulled out and placed in a larger school that had the resources to meet my needs and a diverse student population, meaning I was no longer alone.

The turning point came for me in my new school. My special education teacher, Ms. A, was like family to me. She took me and my classmates in as if we were her own kids and created a space where we could truly be our authentic selves. Most of us spent as much time as possible in her room—eating lunch there, coming there when other classes were too much, or when we were in trouble. Her room at the end of the hall became home, and it was the first space at school where I was treated like a real person deserving of love, respect, and an equal education—not because of what I could be, but simply because I was who I was.

Ms. A and my 7th-grade science teacher, Ms.N, were the most impactful teachers I ever had. They built in me the confidence to try, to fail, and to still be sure of my own intellect and strengths. They believed in me, and while one showed it through consistent compassion and the other through firm and high expectations, they taught me in tandem to believe in myself.

Learning to Manage ADHD

For me, ADHD medicine made me feel like a miserable zombie. Through counseling and help from Ms. A, I began to grow coping skills to help manage my ADHD symptoms in middle school. In high school, after losing the support of Ms. A, I was set on a crash course to failure as I navigated my learning disabilities and ADHD with little support. The stress caused my body to give out, and I became very sick. After leaving school for a full year, I came back, got my last math credit, and graduated a year early, though without honors.

The real learning came in college. I was on my own, in my own space, and responsible for my own success. Somehow, as the stakes were raised and school was no longer somewhere I was forced to go free of charge to my parents, I stepped up and was very successful in the college environment. I also found that as long as I was able to tailor my studies towards my interests, I was incredibly successful in my classes. When COVID hit, school became a different story, but my freshman and sophomore years helped me set a firm foundation for adulthood and coping with ADHD.

Embracing the Positives

ADHD isn’t all about challenges. It also comes with unique strengths. My mind's constant activity means I’m brimming with ideas and creativity. I'm great in a crisis and a natural problem solver. I can hyperfocus on things and tasks I'm interested in, often producing high-quality work in a short amount of time. Embracing these positives has been crucial in my journey.

Challenges in Adulthood

Burnout and job dissatisfaction also impacted my life before and during grad school. I have found that desk jobs (and even supervisors) are not for me, and I tend to sabotage myself when I'm at one long enough to get bored. So I intentionally chose a career path where I could be more autonomous, keep busy with things I am fascinated by, and frequently deal with chaos and upended schedules. Variation and positive stress help me to be successful.

Even with these strategies, ADHD continues to present challenges. I still sometimes struggle with authority and time management and often find myself picking fun tasks and procrastinating the more mundane parts of my job. However, I’ve learned to be kinder to myself, understanding that setbacks are part of the process. I have also learned that in most things, I can set myself up for success by doing the things I know work for me.

Advocacy and Awareness

Living with ADHD has made me passionate about raising awareness and advocating for others with the condition. Misconceptions still abound, and many people, especially adults, go undiagnosed. Many children who are diagnosed are mistreated and abused. Sharing my story is one way I hope to contribute to a broader understanding and acceptance of ADHD.

Conclusion

Living with ADHD is a journey of continuous learning and adaptation. It’s about finding what works for you and accepting that it’s okay to be different. My ADHD is part of who I am, and while it comes with challenges, it also brings unique strengths and perspectives. By understanding and embracing my ADHD, I’ve learned to navigate life with resilience and creativity. If you’re on a similar journey, know that you’re not alone, and there is help and support available. Together, we can turn our challenges into strengths and thrive in a world that often feels too rigid for our dynamic minds.

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